the other day we were discussing dating and this one dude was like “I don’t see the big deal why can’t people just ask people out without all the fuss” and another guy was like “well you get nervous and you get butterflies in your stomach ya know” and the first dude looked the other dude straight in the eye and said “DIGEST THEM.”
UGH i don’t know why but that last post pisses me off so much holy shit. Guys are dicks in many different respects but if we scratch out balls just. Who cares. Who really fucking cares.
damn son vaginas get itchy too and u don’t see us shoving our hands down our pants it’s called self control go find some
DAMN SON VAGINAS GET ITCHY TOO AND U DON’T SEE US SHOVING OUR HANDS DOWN OUR PANTS IT’S CALLED SELF CONTROL G O F I N D S O M E
Actually how about you stop? How many times have you guys re-adjusted your bras because your tits were uncomfortable? You don’t think about it. You just do it because hey, it’s quick, it’s easy, and if somebody starts calling you out on it, you don’t give 2 fucks. That’s the proper analogy here because yes vaginas are the female version of a dick i guess, the testicles are the dude version of tits. Super sensitive and get uncomfortable a lot. So cut a guy some slack. If you see him scratch his balls and then try to touch you then fuck no, tell him to go wash his fucking hands, that’s gross. But if he does it and says absolutely nothing to you, then leave it alone. I’m not trying to be rude but seriously, stop with this bullshit. It makes dudes feel bad for trying to make themselves feel comfortable while just sitting the fuck down.
Sometimes I just strip down naked and just look down at myself and think ‘it looks so weird. What is this?’
Dicks are weird
Shit like this is why I don’t understand hating kids. They’re basically just tiny nightbloggers.
when you accidentally start watching a crime show and can’t get yourself to switch the channel because now you wanna know who fucking did it
ATTENTION: if you see a post like this, IT IS A SCREAMER. DO NOT CLICK THE LINK.
The screamer includes a black and white flashy gif maximized to fit your browser and a very loud piercing screech noise. If in any way this can trigger you, please be aware and reblog to signal boost.
thankyou ohmygod a friend linked me this literally 2 minutes ago and i was about to click it and i would’ve had a seizure you saved my life ohmygod im so grateful
I just can’t
how bad the puns on this site are getting
That is the best pun EVER
I HAVE NEVER GONE FROM HAPPY TO ACTUALLY CRYING REAL TEARS SO QUICKLY IN MY LIFE WHAT THE FUCK
NO FUCK YOU
when will my reflection show who I am inside?
Websites for when you want to:
- un-disgruntle yourself
- comfort someone
- be comforted
- go to a quiet place
- press a magic button and fix everything
- get a hug
- see something cute
- hear rain noises
- play cute games
- cut something/someone (blood)
- break something
- open a window
- have a guided relaxation
- listen to nature sounds (or here)
- do nothing for 2 minutes
- play the piano
- make cute ecards
- make cool music (ex.)
- get an idea for what to do
- avoid boredom
- watch a dream
- have a stickman adventure
Nothing, literally nothing could make me laugh harder than this did.
WHAT IN THE ALMIGHTY FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
It’s so much better than you expect it to be.